Auld Lang Syne

we are all made of stars

I hope everyone had a fun and relaxing holiday season.  I’m sorry I haven’t blogged lately, but I got caught up with moving from Toronto back home, Chanukah and Christmas celebrations, and being sick.  Go figure.  I haven’t been sick since Sept. 2008, and didn’t catch anything when I lived in Toronto and used public transit every day, but the first day I come home, I get my dad and brother’s colds.  Anyway, I was going to write a super stellar post about how this Christmas season, I was reflecting a lot on the humanity of Jesus and the significance of his infancy, but the moment passed and now it’s no longer a timely message.  Even though I had a lovely Christmas and was more in the “Christmas spirit” this year than in years past, now I’m looking forward to the new year.  The new decade.

look up, look forward

 

2009 was a pretty swell year for me.  I became a graduate, an intern, a working journalist, a novel writer, and best of all, an aunt.  2010 now sits before me, sparkling and new.  The possibilities are limitless.  And this year, I have no idea what the future holds for me.  I have no idea where I’ll end up, where I’ll get a job, what my path will look like.  It’s exciting and petrifying at the same time.  That is why I’m declaring the year of 2010 as a year of trust.  Trusting God with my future, my job situation which is currently undecided, my career, my many fears, my relationships, and every other tiny detail.  I’m also holding Romans 8:28 very dear to my heart this year: “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them” (NLT).

I’m not exactly a firm believer in New Year’s Resolutions, but I’ve come up with a list of things I’d like to accomplish, at least in this decade.  There are things, like getting behind the wheel again and getting my full license, and finding a steady job which are no-brainers, but the others are just a few things I thought would help contribute to bettering myself as a person, or something like that. 

• Teach myself how to knit (I got a beginner’s kit for Christmas, so I’m well on my way!)
• Teach myself sign language
• Teach myself German
• Revise my workout schedule to incorporate dance and more cardio
• Travel somewhere … anywhere, even if the finances don’t allow such a luxury (Montreal wouldn’t put such a huge dent in my bank account, would it?)
• Read a crime/mystery/thriller/law book, just ‘cuz
• Learn a tea-making ritual
• Learn how to play a card game
• Learn to cook yummy dishes
• Edit Unlovely and rewrite Angelica’s Wings
• … And do a lot more of things I love, like this:

one book after the other ...

How about you, blogosphere?  Have you made any New Year’s or New Decade’s Resolutions?  What are you most looking forward to in 2010?

Distractions Thursday

So basically right now I’m just procrastinating from writing this article … which will be my last article for my internship!  Maybe that’s why it’s so hard to write.

During my Web-browsing, I came across some humourous things which will provide you with some distraction.  Enjoy!

First of all, this list of stereotyping people by their favourite author.  What does your favourite author say about you?  According to this list, I’m a girl who made out with other girls in college when I was going through a “phase” (Jane Austen), and a female high-school French teacher with a master’s degree (Virginia Woolf).  I wonder what loving the Brontë sisters says about me (they’re not on the list)?  That I’m an obsessive romantic with a dark side (quite accurate)?  

Take a look at the list.  Is your favourite author(s) on there?  What does that say about you?  Are you a youth group leader who picked your nose in fourth grade (C.S. Lewis)?  Or a woman whose favourite colour is hunter green (Margaret Atwood)?  

From the same blogger is this website of pure comedic gold: http://www.momsmsgs.com.  

From the website’s About section:

We decided to start this site when we realized that because of technology and social networks, parents can be annoying more often and in a more public way. The texts messages are embarrassing enough – you only have to provide us with your first name and your relation to the offender.

And remember Mom and Dad, we only poke fun because we love you.

Anyone who has received a ridiculously misspelled text message, e-mail, or awkward facebook status comment from their parents will truly appreciate the humour of this website which had me laughing hysterically at work (co-workers think I’m nuts)! 

Here are some of my favourites:

Becky: OMG Gossip Girl was so good!

Becky’s Mom: What does OMG mean? It sounds like you’re choking.  (Facebook status comment)

Janna’s Mom: Why can’t we all get along?

Janna: What happened now

Janna’s Mom: Aunt Nancy said that she wasn’t coming to Christmas because Dad told you guys about how she went to Twilight by herself (text messages)

James: We won the ultimate frisbee tourney!

James’ Mom: You’re my favorite little mathlete. I remember you when! (Facebook status comment)

Ryan’s Mom: Is that bar really a cougar place? I’m scared they’ll take my hubby away!

Ryan: Dad’s 61. You have nothing to worry about.  (text messages) 

Remind me to start saving my mom’s text messages, okay?

Wonderful Quote Wednesday #2

 

The Holiday -- one of my favourite Christmas movies

 

We are each the love of someone’s life — Andrew Sean Greer, from “The Confessions of Max Tivoli”

 

Virginia Woolf

 

No need to hurry. No need to sparkle. No need to be anybody but oneself – Virginia Woolf (via Shawna) 

 

BAAAAAAAAA!

 

The heart set to do the Father’s will need never fear defeat. His promises of guidance may be fully counted upon. Does it make sense to believe that the Shepherd would care less about getting His sheep where He wants to go than they are about getting there? — Elisabeth Elliot (via Diane) 

 

This picture has nothing to do with the following quote; I'm just in love with it!

Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; but remember that what you now have was once among the things only hoped for – Epicurus 

Sweet Resignation

 

My new motto

My internship ends on Friday, I’m moving back to small-town Ontario on Saturday, my fabulous — albeit short — time in the city has drawn to a close, and I’m resigned to my fate. 

I’m not allowing myself to feel stressed out and depressed by the fact that I’m 24 (shhhhh–don’t tell anyone) and returning to the nest yet again. I’m trying not to get too frustrated by the job search process and being in this weird position of having a university degree and some experience, but not enough to land me the kind of job I want.

I had hoped that by the end of the internship I’d have something secured in the city and be able to live here independently (you know, with the cool neighbourhood, the pet, the apartment with exposed brick), but things don’t always work out the way you plan.  As my boyfriend always says, “If you want to make God laugh, make plans.” Or something along those lines. I’ve been very lucky thus far with two internships (one paid, one unpaid, but both providing amazing experiences) and a full-time summer job as a reporter for the local paper, straight out of university. I know that not many people get those chances, and I’m very grateful for them. I’m also prepared to work hard and not expect a job to just be handed to me, if that’s what it takes to achieve your dreams.

I’m remembering to keep calm and carry on.  

I’m sad to leave the city I love, the hustle and bustle and busyness and excitement, the convenience of the TTC, the cool places to shop, eat, and hang out, seeing my boyfriend every weekend, and the friends. In the small-town, the transportation situation is what you would expect of a small-town, there’s one cafe, a couple dive bars, and no one between the ages of 21-30 that isn’t married or knocked up (or both?) And it’s 120 minutes away from my boyfriend, which isn’t that far but still too far for me! 

At the same time, I’ll be moving home on the 19th — a week before Christmas.  I’m excited to sit by the Christmas tree with my dog, feeling merry and bright and relaxed. I’m excited to be with my family and see my baby nephew more often. I’m excited to sleep in my comfy Queen-sized bed and enjoy quiet times in my own room with all my books and things.

But I’m especially excited for Christmas. In the past few years, the hindrance of semester-end essays and exams, in addition to deaths in the family, drastically delayed when I felt the “Christmas spirit,” if at all. This year, I’ve been feeling Christmassy since mid-November and have been listening to Christmas music nonstop for the last three weeks. 

I may not know what the future holds, but I’m learning to enjoy every little moment in between and be thankful for every circumstance.

Every wall is a door — Ralph Waldo Emerson

Bad News Bears

 

Me, around 4:30 p.m. when I'm hungry

Last night I had the most vivid dreams about bears.  There were scary, murderous bears on the loose in Toronto that were eating people and otherwise roaming around public places in a threatening way.  For some reason, the police or animal control were not present.  I was supposed to meet my boyfriend at a mall and there was a bear at the entrance, looming ominously in a pool of blood and human heads. Gross, I know.  The overall feeling in the dream was one of dread, impending danger and slowly escalating fear, as though the bears stood for something larger than themselves.

It’s not often that I dream about bears.  Dolphins, whales, porpoises, and other sea life, but never bears.  I have recurring images in my dreams of staring out at a body of water, whether it be the ocean or Lake Ontario, and catching a glimpse of fins in the distance, thousands and thousands of these mysterious underwater creatures.  The feeling in these dreams is always surreal, exciting, and as though I’ve discovered some great secret.

I’m a huge animal lover, so it’s no surprise that they frequent my dreaming life.  I decided to look over at Dream Moods to see if they could offer any interpretations.

Here’s what they had to say about bears:

To see a bear in your dream, symbolizes independence, the cycle of life, death and renewal. It may signal a period of introspection and thinking. The dream may also be a pun on “bare.” Perhaps you need to bare your soul and let everything out into the open.

To dream that you are being pursued or attached by a bear, denotes aggression, overwhelming obstacles and competition. You may find yourself in a threatening situation.

Well, I’m going to be without a job pretty soon and am not sure what the New Year holds, so does that count as overwhelming obstacles? 

Nice tail, whale!

When I asked my mom about dreaming of dolphins and whales, she mentioned something about spirituality. Dream Moods confirms this:

To see a whale in your dream, represents your intuition and awareness. You are in tune to your sense of spirituality. Alternatively, it indicates a relationship or business project that is too enormous to handle. You may be feeling overwhelmed. The dream may also be a pun on “wailing” and a desire to cry out about something.

To see a dolphin in your dream, symbolizes spiritual guidance, your intellect, mental attributes and emotional trust. Utilize your mind to its capacity and you will move upward in life. Alternatively, it suggests that a line of communication has been established between the conscious and unconscious aspects of yourself. Dolphins represent your willingness and ability to explore and navigate through your emotions.

To see an ocean in your dream, represents the state of your emotions and feelings. It is indicative of some spiritual refreshment, tranquility and renewal.

I also have recurring dreams of being pursued by someone in a huge house or mansion. They’re always so close to catching me, but as I run through the house, I can lucid dream and create secret doors, rooms, and escapes. There’s a sense of danger to these dreams, but also a sense of thrill. 

To dream that you are being chased, signifies that you are avoiding a situation that you do not think is conquerable. It is often a metaphor for some form of insecurity.

I’m a firm believer in the power of dreams and what they have to say about our waking lives.  Some can even be prophetic.  While some dreams can be what we called in Psychology 101 “pizza dreams,” (ie. they have more to do with what you ate before you fell asleep than your subsconscious mind), most of my dreams are too vivid to ignore.

How about you?  Do you have any recurring dreams that you’ve always wanted to interpret?

Snarky Artists

Oh, the Missed Connections on Craigslist.  I love reading these.  I’d be interested in finding out if people have actually ever hooked up as a result of reading a Missed Connection.  ”Wait a minute … I was wearing a long pea coat and orange scarf on the GO Train headed to Oakville from Union Station last Thursday night, reading a copy of Sylvia Plath’s The Bell Jar!  And I totally made flirty eye contact with a guy in a plaid jacket who was reading Wired magazine!  Who knew that he was falling in love with me?”  

And then, budda-boom budda-bing, dates, love, marriage, and a litter of puppies.

Anyway, my sister drew my attention to this one in particular, which is less a Missed Connection and more a reaction to an unpleasant experience at an art store on Spadina.  It’s just too rich not to share in its entirety (PS: there’s some swearing, but I wanted to repost it here without any alterations):

To the prissy bitch who said I was from Cobourg – w4m – 22 (Art Supply Store, Spadina)

So yesterday I was just perusing the stores on Spadina in Toronto when I walked into your little art supply store. After a bit of browsing I decided to buy a new pen. 
Then suddenly, your exaggerated effeminate squeak startled me from behind a row of paintbrushes: “Wow! You came all the way from Cobourg to buy a pen!” *snicker*”. I can only assume that you were referring to my rustic attire that day. Yes, I was wearing an old coat and a scarf and hat that I knitted myself, but need I remind you that it’s FREEZING out? And this economy?? 
I do get the impression however, that you don’t mind hypothermia as long as you get to wow the world with your form-fitting Prada pea coat in chartreuse! Usually I would have let you have it right there in the store, but for one thing, lucky for you I didn’t want the boy I was with to witness the wrath I am capable of, and also your polite meanness made it difficult for me to determine whether you were a bitch or just really stupid. I have determined now that you are both. 

Yes, my coat is several years old and No, I do not plan on getting a new one. I’m a student you see, paying tuition and rent does not leave much freedom to be stylish. But I suppose it’s hard for you to remember what it was like being young, seeing as you are now a bitter, mean old man. 
I will admit- the fit of your black shirt and jeans made you look positively prim, and I’m sure you’re saving the world one cute outfit at a time! But I beg you to respect the fact that many of us are doing the same in different, more effective ways; like you know, for example, not being a mass-consumerist whore! 
What is this? The 16th century? Turning your nose up at peasants? Fuck you! Just because you have no goals in life other than to work at a little art store and use words like “pomo” and “appropriation of modernist perspective” and wear lots of black to make yourself feel like an artist, doesn’t mean you have to take it out on those of us who still have real goals. 
By the way, I am NOT from Coburgh, I was born and raised in Toronto. Although I’ve never been there, I’m sure Cobourg is a lovely place and the people there would be very offended at the way in which you associated their great people with my crusty old jacket. 
I hope you and your highlighted hair, slip in your alligator, pointed toe boots on a pile of your own bullshit and tear a rhinestone off your leather pants! 
Go eat a fist. 

Sincerely, 

The future. 

A hearty Amen from the silent, nearly invisible masses of students/recent-grads/propagators of infinite debt, who cannot afford to keep up with the revolving doors of fashion as displayed by those with steady jobs and family money!

Wonderful Quote Wednesday

The weather in Toronto today is definitely frightful. Getting ready this morning, I listened to an eclectic mix of Christmas music to put me in the holiday spirit: Nat King Cole, The Trans-Siberian Orchestra, and The Vince Guaraldi Trio. I was pleasantly surprised to see some snow on the ground this morning (I only like snow for the Christmas season, and then it can melt), a merry feeling which quickly disappeared once I trudged through ankle-deep slush in my pretty new Aldo boots and braved the rain and — wait for it — thunder and lightning?  Seriously, Mother Nature?  Must you be so cruel?

Anyway, these three random quotes on my Google home page helped to make my day just a little bit brighter.  Enjoy them, along with the photos provided by Google image search!

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult — Rita Rudner

Stay away from the Kool-Aid ...

 

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he’s buying — Fran Lebowitz

You'll eat what I tell you to, spawn of Satan!

 

The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think — Horace Walpole 

Monkey see, monkey do

Reinventing Jane

 

Toby Stephens and Ruth Wilson in BBC's adaptation of Jane Eyre

 

After reading this article, about how new adaptations of Wuthering Heights and Jane Eyre are being made to appeal to Twihards, I have just two questions:

1. Can’t everyone just leave the Brontë sisters alone?
2. Must this Twilight insanity phenomenon influence every aspect of culture, leaving nothing sucked dry (see what I did there?)?

Apparently, Emily’s gothic tale of dangerous, obsessive love has been experiencing an increase in sales due to its mention in the Twilight series and a revamped cover with a sticker that reads: Bella & Edward’s favourite book!   Don’t get me wrong — I’m glad kids are reading (even if they are reading low culture), and that it’s making them turn to the Brontë sisters.  My issue is with how they’re getting there — from a vampire’s recommendation.  I suppose my problem is that I suffer from true Old Lady Syndrome, which is why I haven’t touched the Twilight series, the Harry Potter series, and snobbishly disdain anything with that kind of collective hysteria.  Pop culture phenomena always makes me bristle and embrace the eclectic, the bizarre, the underrated.  When those things become unearthed and re-marketed for mass consumption, I feel as though I’ve been betrayed.  

I forget how I came to read Jane Eyre, but I was probably in grade 8.  As a somewhat pretentious adolescent, I was hungry for a good old-fashioned classic after the joys of reading Pride and Prejudice.  I remember the precise scene where I decided I had found my new favourite book: when Mr. Rochester dresses up as an old gypsy come to read the fortunes of his high society house guests, and Jane’s, and then his identity is revealed.  I remember my heart actually thumping loudly in excitement and fantasizing about Mr. Rochester, even more than I fantasized about the stuffy Mr. Darcy and his wet shirt clinging to his body (our teacher showed us BBC’s Pride and Prejudice as a graduation treat!)

 I have read Jane Eyre countless times since then and it is by far my most favourite book in the entire world.  Each time I read it, something new strikes me, a new dimension is added.  The last time I read it, in third-year Victorian Lit. class, I was shocked by the pre-feminist implications of the novel’s conclusion and the fact that Jane only returns to Rochester when he is blind and physically handicapped. Rereading it now, I’m finding all sorts of comments on the class system and Jane’s peculiar position outside the margins of society.

So strong is my loyalty to the story that I’m automatically nervous whenever a new adaptation is made to a novel I treasure.  Since I’m not a big fan of Wuthering Heights in the first place, I’m not overly concerned that the role of Heathcliff is being played by Ed Westwick of Gossip Girl fame in the newest adaptation.  The 1992 version, starring Juliette Binoche and Ralph Fiennes, was pretty terrible and didn’t make me like the book any more.

However, since she is Charlotte’s sister, I cannot help but feel protective over Emily’s work and its latest bastardization to cater to Twihards and their disposable incomes.

Ladies, drool over your new Heathcliff!

 

The best adaptation of Jane Eyre I’ve ever seen is the BBC’s, starring an appropriately plain Ruth Wilson as Jane and an unconventionally sexy Toby Stephens as Rochester. If anyone has the rights to classic British literature, it’s the British, and they usually get it right, as is evident in their long, yet mostly accurate, adaptation of Pride and Prejudice.  The new Jane Eyre will star very pretty, very young (and very un-Jane Eyre-like) Mia Wasikowska and a ridiculously handsome Michael Fassbender whom I haven’t seen in anything else.

Will he live up to Toby Stephens' Rochester?

 

Too pretty to be plain Jane Eyre?

 

Needless to say, I’m very nervous about this adaptation, as I am with the untitled Dominic Murphy film project about the “imaginative worlds invented by the Brontës as adolescents.” According to Murphy’s producer Mike Downey:

“There is a whole younger audience out there that is ripe to enjoy these darker versions of what is generally served up, and the response from funders has been very upbeat, especially in the light of the recent success of Twilight”

I’m throwing up my hands, Stephenie Meyer.  If your terribly written, yet extremely successful series is going to lead sheep teens to my beloved classics, so be it.  If anything, it will give them their first taste of literature so good that it has stood the test of time.

The Prosary: an online litmag for spiritual prose

Hello everyone!

With Rikki’s encouragement (and the idea for a name), I just launched a new venture: an online literary magazine for spiritual prose. It’s still in the first stages while I work some things out, but please feel free to visit the website and read the work already published to get an idea of where I want to go with this.

The Prosary is available at: http://theprosary.wordpress.com

If you’d like to submit something to be published, keep reading: 

The Prosary is an online literary magazine magazine dedicated to publishing prose of a spiritual nature. This includes creative poetry, short stories, and other works of fiction inspired by one’s faith journey.

Although the name Prosary evokes images of a Catholic inclination, this litmag will publish works from any faith, whether you identify yourself as Protestant, Christian, Jewish, Moslem, Hindu, Buddhist, and anything outside or in between. The important thing is that you remain respectful to the other faiths represented here and do not use your prose as a way of attacking or criticizing any faith or non-faith groups. 

If you’d like to submit something to be published, please e-mail me at theprosary@gmail.com, keeping in mind the following guidelines:

• Send all prose in Word/.doc documents. My computer doesn’t like .docx, so please reformat accordingly
•  The subject line of the e-mail should have your name (or pen name, if you prefer to remain anonymous) and the title of your prose
• Limit 3 works per document
•  DO NOT send any prose that is hateful, disrespectful or overtly “Rah rah rah, my religion is the best!” 
• The Prosary is only accepting works of fiction at this time (this may change … we shall see)
•  You will receive an e-mail notification when your prose is published on the website 

The Prosary is a new venture, so please excuse any hiccups or mistakes while it gets rolling.  Any suggestions are more than welcome.

Tell your friends!  Spread the word!

I’m excited to begin this journey with you …

Spoiler Alert

I love you, but your breath tastes like an ash tray

Deal breakers.  Come on, we all have them.  

No matter how accepting and genuine you aspire to be, there will always be that tiny little grating detail about someone that spoils them for you, whether you’re single and looking, or in a relationship and just happen to be momentarily fascinated by someone on the subway, for whatever reason.  

They’re sitting across from you and you think, “Now that’s an attractive person,” and every so often, you non-creepily glance at them for the better part of the ride.  And then they turn around and you spot an unsightly mole on the back of their neck.  You non-creepily follow them outside and watch them light up a smoke, and you do not date smokers.  Ever.  They’re carrying a Louis Vuitton-wearing pooch in a little purse.  They walk into Hooters.  Aaaaaaaaaaaand there goes your fun.  They’re spoiled.

Inspired by an episode of a How I Met Your Mother episode of the same name, here are some other “spoiler alerts,” real or imagined.  But mostly real.  

• “I thought you were attractive until you opened your mouth” (this is a pretty common one)
• “You seemed pretty cute, sitting there reading that gigantic tome on the bus.  A fellow bookworm.  And then I saw that you were reading Harry Potter.  Now, not so cute”
• “You were a cool and original person until I saw you shopping un-ironically at American Apparel”
• “You seemed so awesome until I received an e-mail from you and you spelled ‘you’re’ like ‘your’”
• “You were hot until I heard you listening to Rihanna on your iPod”
• “I thought we could be the best of friends … and then I saw Twilight listed as your favourite book on Facebook. The BFF position is now closed”
• “You seemed attractive from the back … but then you turned around and you’re wearing a Leafs jersey”

How about you, blogosphere?  What are some of your deal breakers and spoiler alerts?  What tiny detail about a stranger makes you not want to date them or cease to think they’re attractive?  And don’t feel superficial because we all do it.  Some of us just don’t like admitting it.